I went to clubs and talked to dozens of girls each night. But I was tense while doing it. I thought I had to do this. But why did I have to? For some reason it was really important to be a guy who could seduce women. And I thought I had to do it that way. Why was it important? That’s the important question.
When something is “important” or “serious”, there’s FEAR underneath. Fear of losing something. I can’t really describe this fear, but if you continue to actualize yourself, these fears will be challenged.
Life experience has widened my perspective, and made me see that things I was afraid of losing or missing out on were‘t important, or real.
For example… I used to spend a tremendous amount of energy on trying to make sure that girls liked me.
Today I stress a lot less about what girls think about me, whether they are attracted to me or don’t care.
All that happened is that it wasn’t as important anymore. Even the idea of having sex with some of these girls lost importance. Today I see through a lot more of the illusions of my desires. I still appreciate them, but I don’t feel dependant.
Doesn’t sound all that sexy, does it?
But look…
When something is important to you, you’ll keep it away. When you let go, there’s a higher chance it’ll be yours. And if you might even enjoy it more since it’s not as SERIOUS.
When you’re feeling frustrated about not making progress, take time to relax. We’re frustrated because we feel like we need to be somewhere we’re not. Somewhere further. Somewhere else. The truth is we are not there yet so we can’t do anything other than accepting that fact. This is a journey. Be grateful for every sign of progress.